Hold That Tiger
Regular Prisoners * Colonel Hogan - Bob Crane * Corporal Louis LeBeau - Robert Clary * Corporal Peter Newkirk - Richard Dawson * Sergeant James Kinchloe - Ivan Dixon * Sergeant Andrew Carter - Larry Hovis Camp Personnel * Kommandant Wilhelm Klink - Werner Klemperer * Sergeant Hans Schultz - John Banner Semi-Regulars * Fraulein Helga - Cynthia Lynn * Corporal Karl Langenscheidt - Jon Cedar * Sergeant Olsen - Stewart Moss Guest Stars * Tiger Lily - Arlene Martel * General Hofstader - Henry Rico Cattani Synopsis Colonel Klink boasts to Hogan and his men during an evening roll call that Germany was developing some new and powerful weapons, including the new Tiger tank, which he claimed would help to shorten the war, thus leading to a German victory. After roll call is over, Hogan quickly asked Klink if the tanks of the afformentioned ''Panzer'' Division were west of the camp; Klink tells him no, before Hogan goes into his barracks leaving. Klink's boast leads Hogan and his men to start coming up with an elaborate scheme so that they can get their hands on one of the Tiger tanks, from which they would make blueprints that they would then send over to London. Eventually, Hogan comes up with a plan. The prisoners are soon working on an inside wall of Barracks 2, when Schultz appears. After he asks what was going on, Hogan tells Schultz that they were going to put in a picture window that would give the prisoners a sweeping view of the delousing station. An SS officer, actually Newkirk in disguise, than appears, addressing Schultz. A panicing Schultz then calms down after seeing that it was Newkirk, but then becomes curious and asks Hogan why Newkirk was wearing the uniform. After being told the reason why by Hogan, a now very panicky Schultz leaves. Later Hogan enters Klink's office to protest to Klink about his men being interrogated by a Gestapo officer. Corporal Langenscheidt soon appears, after knocking on Klink's door several times, to inform Klink that a Gestapo officer wanted to leave the camp, but he can't as he didn't seem to have the proper papers. Klink tells the corporal to let the Gestapo officer go, having no clue that it was actually Newkirk in disguise. Hogan, moments before a new roll call is to begin, briefs his man in his office on what they were going to do when Newkirk arrives at camp with the captured Tiger tank, including LeBeau escaping during the confusion that would be caused by the tank's arrival, so that he would be able to switch places with the underground agent who would later take the tank's blueprints back to London. The men then go out for roll call. During roll call, one of the prisoners is soon discovered missing by Schultz. As he starts to report this to Klink, when one of the new Tiger tanks suddenly enters in Stalag 13, driven by a German officer who was claiming that he had been sent to help put down a prisoner revolt. The officer is actually Newkirk, still disguised as the SS officer, but now wearing a tanker's helmet. Klink, although presented papers which claims that the officer had been ordered to crush the non-existant revolt, argues with the still disguised Newkirk about him calling for a tank, during which LeBeau leaves the camp as planned. After LeBeau has left the camp, Hogan informs Klink that one of his men had escaped. Klink then calls for the prison guards to start looking for the escaped prisoner, while Newkirk starts to join in with the tank. At the same time, the others prisoners are ordered back into their barracks. Moments later, Newkirk drives the tank into Barracks 2, watched by a shooked Schultz, who then joins the search for the escaped prisoner. Once the tank is inside the Barracks, Hogan's men start to dismantle it, with its part soon sent down the tunnels, where blueprints of them are quickly made. Later, the tank is put back together inside the rec hall, all done right under Klink's nose. Later, Carter reenters the Barracks 2, informing Hogan that the search for LeBeau was still going on. The prisoners then hear a knock under the emergency entrance, which was under another bunk bed towards the rear, which confuses them. After the entrance opens up, LeBeau appears, soon informing Hogan and the others that he had comes back because the agreed to plan won't work. After being lectured by Hogan, LeBeau informs him that the underground contact was waiting for permission to enter. Hogan tells the contact to come up, who turns out to be - Tiger, a female French resistance fighter, soon revealing why LeBeau thought that the original plan wouldn't work now. Hogan blows his stack upon being informed that she was the agent who would be taking the completed blueprints out of the camp, before he watched his men argue over who's bunk Tiger would be sleeping in. In spite of Hogan's reluctance, Tiger is shortly being fitted for some bulky civilian clothing inside Hogan's office, within which would be sown the tank blueprints. Newkirk is somewhat reluctant to place the measuring tape across Tiger's bust during the fitting. After Tiger and Hogan argue over her being there, she is informed that the dismantled tank would be put back together and would be used to help cover her escape. Schultz then appears, soon walking past Tiger and telling Hogan that Klink wants to see him, who was mad because there seems to have been no real escape the previous night. It takes a while before he realizes that Tiger, a woman, was in the room, causing him to panic for a while, before he finally leaves. Inside Klink's office, Hogan is reprimanded for telling Klink that a prisoner was missing the previous night only for him to be found at roll call that morning, and for that the rec hall would be closed to the prisoners for a week. After that, Klink then asks Hogan if he has seen the tank and if he or his men have seen it leave. When Hogan informs Klink that they had been locked up in their barracks, Klink asks him if his men have even taken a peak through the windows. Helga then appears, telling Klink that he has a call from General Hofstader, who was asking about the tank. Klink picks up his phone, and speaks with the general, soon telling him that, truthfully, he had never asked for it, and while it had been there, he had been involved with a prison escape attempt that wasn't and that it was gone when he looked back. He then tells the general that he would look for it. After the call, Hogan asks if the Germans were missing a tank. Klink suspects that the tank was still inside the camp and that he would have his men look everywhere for it, including the prisoners. Hogan leaves after hearing this, telling Klink that he was sure that the tank would reappear. Later, after LeBeau had finished making a complaint to Kinchloe about his coffee pot being used as a listening device, Kinch quickly informs the colonel that General Hofstader was on his way to get the tank back. Hogan then informs Newkirk that he might as well prepare the tank for its exit. As Newkirk leaves, Tiger and LeBeau walks into Hogan's office, with Tiger now in the bulky trainman's uniform. After she models it, and Hogan was told by LeBeau that the blueprints were sewn into the uniform, during which Kinch leaves Hogan's office. Hogan then tell LeBeau to give her some fatique clothes that could go over the uniform for roll call. LeBeau gives her the clothes, and after while wishing her good luck, he leaves. When she had a little trouble trying to put on the overalls, Hogan tries to help her, but she informs him that she could put them on by herself. Once dressed, she apologizes for the trouble that she had caused Hogan by being there, but she then tells him why she had taken the assignment: she has heard a lot of good things about his group and wanted to see for herself. After being there for a while, she could now see why they had such a high reputation. The two then hears the bell for roll call, and after being reminded by Kinch, they go out and joins the others for roll call. Soon, Tiger was standing with the prisoners outside Barracks 2. During this roll call, an angry General Hofstader arrives at the stalag in his staff car, along with his staff, soon demanding to know the whereabouts of the still missing tank. The general and Klink argues about the tank's location, while Schultz was getting very nervous over the fact that Tiger was standing with the prisoners, in Newkirk's spot. Hogan promises Schultz that Newkirk would be back soon, just as Newkirk starts the tank inside the rec room. As Klink tries to convince the general not to tell Berlin about the missing tank, he tells the general that he was sure that the tank would appear. Which it does, as it burst out of the rec hall, soon headed towards Klink and the general. The general quickly steps in front of the tank, demanding it to stop. When it doesn't, he jumps out of the way, while later Klink announces that there were prisoners inside it, using the tank to escape the camp. During the confusion, as the tank burst through the front gate, soon followed by the general's staff car and Klink's men, Tiger, after kissing Hogan, escapes from the camp with the plans. Later, Klink and Hogan are in Klink's office, with Klink pacing around the room while Hogan is shown cracking a walnut with Klink's helmet. Klink, after taking back his helmet and placing it back onto his desk, asks Hogan what had just happened. Hogan answers by saying that it was all a Gestapo plot to blemish his strong no-escape record because they were jealous of him back in Berlin. As he waits for a reply, Hogan pours himself some sherry from a decanter for himself, which he then drinks. Klink is disbelieving at first, but quickly accepts Hogan's explanation, as Hogan takes a cigar from the cigar box on Klink's desk. Hogan soon leaves Kink's office, with Klink staring at him as the episode ends. Story Notes * This is the third completed episode of the series, but the second episode to be shown on television. * This is the first episode in color. * Colonel Hogan's airman hat sitting atop of Colonel Klink's spiked helmet is shown with the end credits for the first time. * This is the first time the term, Stalag 13, is used in the series. * This is Corporal Langenscheidt's first official appearance in the series. He also appeared in the pilot episode but has no "major" part to play in it. * This is Tiger's first appearance in the series. * This is Carter's first appearance as a sergeant. * During this episode, Klink comes out of his office and salutes. This clip is (re)used in the opening montage/credits throughout the rest of the series. * As Larry Hovis (Carter) has just joined the series, they do not have any footage of him yet so they film him working the antenna for the radio as his name comes up during the credits opening montage. It runs right after the footage credits of Ivan Dixon (Kinch) - always the radio man - also running the radio. This lasts until episode 4 when they switch over to the 'Carter mixing chemicals' as his footage credits. * Two historical figures are mentioned in this episode: Mata Hari and Tokyo Rose. Quotes After Colonel Hogan decides that they would steal one of the Tiger tanks: * Newkirk (In shock): Steal a German tank? * Hogan: We'll give it back... after we take it apart and make blueprints. * Kinchloe: Well, how do we get a hold of it? * LeBeau: How do we get it in here? * Newkirk: Where are we going to hide a tank? * Carter: Where do we take it apart? * Hogan: Look... I got the idea of stealing it, right? The rest is detail. --------------- After Schultz enters Barracks 2 and see the prisoners trying to pull apart up a wall: * Schultz: What? What is? What? What? What is? What? What is what? * Hogan: Remodeling, Schultz. You see, we knock out this wall here, put in a picture window, which gives us a sweeping vista to the delousing station. Then, with some Danish modern pieces in place of... Or what would you think of Provincial, Schultz? * Schultz: Please, Colonel Hogan! * Hogan: How else would we get the tank in? * Schultz: Tank? Tank? Tank? Tank? Tank? Tank? * Hogan: So we can take it apart. * Schultz: Oh no! (as he closes his eyes) I don't see anything! I hear nothing! Nothing! --------------- After Schultz has spoken with a German officer (actually Newkirk in a disguise): * Schultz: What a relief? If the Gestapo would uncover what's going on in here. (Finally realizing that Newkirk is in a SS officer uniform) Colonel Hogan... * Hogan (Looking at Schultz): Hmm? * Schults: What is he doing in the uniform? Colonel Hogan! Please. Oooohhhh, you went too far. I must report this. It would be worth my life if I do not report this. * Hogan: It's only until tomorrow. Then he's gonna take it off again. * Schultz (slightly relieved): Aaahhhhh! * Hogan: After he steals the tank. * Schultz (Starting to panic): Ooooohhhh!!!!! * Hogan: From the Panzer division. * Schultz: (Panicing more as he heads towards the door): Aaaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!!!! * Hogan: And brings it here into the barracks. * Schultz (panicing): Oh, I see nothing! I was not here! I did not even get up this morning! (Schultz then leaves.) --------------- After Schultz have discovered that one of the prisoners was missing, he asks Hogan for help: * Klink (yelling): Reeeeeeport! * Schultz: How can I make a report when number fifteen is missing? * Hogan: Look at the bright side - fourteen are here. --------------- Newkirk, now disguise as a panzer commander, pops his head out of a Tiger tank, which had just arrived at the stalag: * Newkirk: Well, where are these rebellious prisoners? The Tiger tank shall smash them, flat... like pancakes! * Klink (confused): Rebellious prisoner? There are no rebellious prisoners here! They are tame... I have tamed them! * Newkirk: Then why did you request a tank? * Klink: I did not! * Newkirk: You question the word of a Gestapo officer? * Klink: Certainly not! * Newkirk: Here are my orders! (Takes fakes orders out of his pocket and throws them to Schultz) * Klink (looks at the faux orders after being given them by Schultz): They are certainly authentic. I... * Newkirk: Could there be any doubts? * Klink: Not a doubt in the world! * Hogan: Sir... request permission to speak? * Klink (looks at Hogan, frustrated): No! Yes! * Hogan: I regret to inform you sir that one of my men seems to have escaped. * Klink: Escaped?? * Hogan (faking being apologetic): He receives a letter from home today, sir. His girl sent him a, uhm, candid snapshot. * Newkirk: So! These are your tame prisoners! --------------- After a still disguised Newkirk has driven the Tiger tank into the Barracks 2, and as the prisoners start to dismantle it: * Newkirk: All I wanted was an oil change! --------------- After Tiger's arrival at the camp, as Hogan figures out where to put her up for the night: * Hogan (angry that his group may be compromised by her being there): Look, this is no game. Guys risk their lives escaping from other camps... We sneak them in here... They depend on us to get them out of Germany... Our whole operation can go right down the drain just cause they send us a woman. * Tiger (also mad): I have had many more missions, more dangerous then this. And they did not send me - I volunteered. * Hogan: Alright, so you're Mata Hari, but this is an all-male camp! Just where, for instance, do we put you up?? * Newkirk: 'ey, in the spirit of hands across the sea and all that, eh, I hereby volunteer to share my cubicle. The other prisoners then chime in while an angry Hogan listens in frustration. --------------- As Hogan continues to object to Tiger being the one taking the blueprints to London while she was being fitted for a uniform: * Hogan: Do the best you can. We got to get her out of here tonight looking like a German civilian. Some kind of a bulky uniform to carry these blueprints. * Tiger: Colonel. Women work as crew on the German trains... * Hogan (exasperated): I don't care if you put on a kimona and go as Tokyo Rose! Let's just ad lib the whole thing, huh? * Tiger: Why not? The worst that can happen to you is you get one week in solitary. All I can get is shot! * Hogan: Alright, alrght, just have her ready for roll call tonight. The diversion is the tank coming out of the rec hall. And, then you take off after that. * Tiger (surprised): I thought it was in pieces? * Hogan: It is in pieces. We're going to put it back together in the rec hall. After the Germans padlock the place. * Tiger (smiling): Sounds wild. Newkirk tries to act as peacemaker. * Newkirk: Colonel never misses. Everything under control. Always! * Tiger: Except his temper. --------------- After Shultz have noticed Tiger inside Barracks 2: * Schultz: No, no. * Hogan: Tokyo Rose. * Schultz: Oh, Colonel Hogan, this time you went too far... (breaks off while closing his eyes) What am I saying?? I see nothing! Nothing!! --------------- A German general arrives at the camp looking for the now missing Tiger tank, while not seeing a prisoner revolt which was the reason that the tank had been sent to Stalag 13 in the first place. The general looks at Klink: * Klink: General Hofstader. How nice to see you? * General Hofstader: Where is my tank, Klink?? * Klink: It hasn't come back yet? * General Hofstader: Klink, I release a tank to you to put down a riot by prisoners. I see no riot, I see no tank! All I see is a Colonel about to become Corporal! * Klink: But, General Hofstader, we've searched the grounds, the barracks, the prisoners... * General Hofstader: (sarcastically): The prisoners?? No one had it in his pocket?? We are talking about a Tiger tank, Klink, not a toy dump truck!! --------------- Schultz sees Tiger standing with the other prisoners, in Newkirk's spot: * Schultz: Please, Colonel Hogan... you push me too far. * Hogan: What's the matter Schultz? All fifteen not here? * Schultz: Fifteen are here, but it is not Newkirk, it doesn't even look like Newkirk... (indicating Tiger) ...in any important respect. * Hogan: Really? * Schultz: Please, Colonel Hogan, I do not wish to interfere in your private life, but I must insist... * Hogan (interrupting Schultz): Schultz, you have my word that Newkirk will be here...any time now. Schultz stifles a groan while Hogan looks towards the rec hall. --------------- Hofstader is heading back to his staff car, with a pleading Klink following him: * Klink (pleading): General Hofstader, it will not be necessary for you to report this to Berlin! The tank will turn up, any time now! (As they talk, Newkirk is in the rec building, starting up the tank.) Klink, Hofstader and the general's aides hear some noises coming from the rec building. This was quickly followed by the tank bursting out of the building. As the tank heads towards them: * Klink: See, I told you it would turn up! --------------- As Tiger and Hogan embrace and kiss just before she leaves the stalag during the confusion caused by the escaping Tiger tank, Schultz steps in front of them: * Schultz: Colonel Hogan... Colonel Hogan... kissing prisoners is verbot! --------------- Klink asks Hogan what had just happened: * Hogan: The Gestapo! * Klink: The Gestapo? * Hogan: Colonel Klink... you never had an escape at Stalag Thirteen. That's a record that not even the Gestapo can match. * Klink: True. But, I, I...? * Hogan: It's a plot to discredit you in Berlin. * Klink: But why? * Hogan: Your efficiency is showing them up. * Klink: No! * Hogan: You have a better theory? * Klink: But this in incredible. What can I do? * Hogan: Well, perhaps, one of these days, we might just be able to arrange an escape. Nothing big - fifteen or twenty men. * Klink (stares at Hogan, then narrows his eyes): Do you realize that what you are Suggesting, Colonel Hogan, is treason! * Hogan: See? You're too perfect. That's why they hate you. Klink is bewildered by Hogan's comment. Bloopers The tank used in the episode was actually an American-built M7 self-propelled gun and not an actual Tiger. External links * Hogan's Heroes Fanclub * Webstalag 13 * The Hofbrau * TV.com Television stories Category:Season One